I went to see the car today. I needed to say goodbye. I needed to see it to make sure that Jeff did not suffer. By looking at the car, you can tell he didn’t. I took pictures. A few friends took pictures too. I brought a few pieces of the car home, just to have. I’m glad I went, now I know. It was kind of a sad day. Conferences were tonight at school, Jeff should have been there, he would have been so proud. Every day that passes, I seem to miss him more. I spend hours thinking of our last moments, our last hours, and our last days. This still sucks.
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We’re still here.
You can keep talking.
Ditto here.
I did not know how close you were to the accident before you wrote it. Don’t know whether this was “good” or just sucking.
How about writing down everything you remember? Here – or for your eyes only. Unfortunately I tend to forget details. Sometimes I feel I do not know very much about my kids’ first years. When one of my nephews was seriously ill I took some notes every single day. Emotions and facts. My sister was not able to do that because she stayed with him all the time. Today I have this file containing so much for all of us.
It could help to “keep” as much as you can. Pieces of the car, memories…
I tell my kids that I love them when we leave each other in the morning. I do not tell my husband. I am sure he knows. But I will think of this…
G.
Love you Honey! I think about you and the kids everyday. Keep doing whatever you have to do to get through this. I promise, it will get better.
Thinking of you and wishing you peace.
What I did was take 1 piece of the car but eventually lost it through all the moves I’ve done. My friend took her husband’s shoe, and just send us both reeling. My sister went and removed Rudi’s personal belongings and washed them for me. For me, it was the worst thing I’ve ever seen but it did help to know the cops were right when they told me they both didn’t feel a thing.
You should do whatever feels right to you right now. I didn’t and I believe it makes a huge difference in being able to move ahead.
Penny
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You are soo right. I find out about this all the time.
Amazing post.